2011.01.02: Well, we’re back from holidays, how are things goiAAAAAAHHHNO! NO NO NO!

For tonight’s discussion I will be playing the part of the unremittingly pissed off fan. For a change.

Another nationally broadcast game, another bumbling, embarrassing effort, in which a team already six points out of the playoffs gets blown out by a team seven points behind them. Some blogs were characterizing this as must-win, and I think that they were right: halfway through the season, management has to think that if this team can’t compete with one of the worst-managed teams in the league, then they need to retool in a big way. I know that hockey is a random sport, in which a team like the Penguins can be a consistent contender and still lose to the Sens and Islanders in the same short period, but having a team that 1) can’t win in overtime, 2) are second last in the league in goals-per-game, with a 20 year old defenceman leading the team in scoring, 3) are fifth worst in goals-against-per-game, most of which seem to be of the crash-the-net and Elliott goes Kitty Pryde variety, and 4) can’t execute a dump-and-chase play to save their life, should be enough to signal that this team is fundamentally flawed.

I’m also just really sick of watching this team shit the bed every single time they’re on Hockey Night in Canada.

So, in the most bloodless, least empathetic way, here’s what I hope to get for some Senators before the trade deadline, along with the minimum I would require to do the trade:

Chris Phillips – ideal: 1st rounder or former 1st round prospect and a late round pick; at least: a 2nd rounder and a late round pick
Alex Kovalev – ideal: 2nd rounder; at least: future considerations
Daniel Alfredsson – ideal: a 1st rounder and two good prospects; at least: a 2nd rounder and a good prospect
Chris Campoli – ideal: late 1st rounder; at least: a 2nd round pick
Brian Elliott – ideal: 2nd rounder; at least: a 4th round pick
Pascal Leclaire – ideal: 2nd rounder; at least: future considerations
Nick Foligno – ideal: late 1st rounder; at least: a 2nd round pick or a prospect with bottom 6 forward potential
Peter Regin – see Nick Foligno
Filip Kuba – ideal: a 2nd rounder; at least: a late round pick
Jason Spezza – ideal: a 1st round pick, a 2nd round pick, and a prospect with top 6 potential or a 20-goal roster player; at least: a 2nd round pick and a good prospect
Milan Michalek – ideal: a late 1st round pick; at least: a 2nd round pick
Sergei Gonchar – ideal: a late 1st round pick; at least: a 4th round pick
Brian Lee – ideal and at least: a poster of Brian Lee
Jarkko Ruutu – ideal: a 3rd round pick; at least: a 5th round pick

3 thoughts on “2011.01.02: Well, we’re back from holidays, how are things goiAAAAAAHHHNO! NO NO NO!

  1. Conrad! Hope you had a great holiday. I grudgingly watched the 1st period of the “game” last night. Truth be told my heart wasn’t in it, no real surprises from our Sens last night. During Coach’s Corner I switched over to the Winter Classic like 95% of online viewers…here are some of my random thoughts on the annual “USA please watch hockey” game.

    1. I was glad the game was played at night.
    2. The camera angles were pretty suspect.
    3. I imagine playing in the rain would be miserable, even if it’s in front of 70,000 fans.
    4. The game itself was pretty blah… The real classic between these two teams was played on Dec. 23.
    5. Crosby having his bell rung was such a weird play, I’d look for him to miss some games with a mild concussion.
    6. Next years game totally depends on the US TV rights… which is sad.
    7. If there was a facility in this city that could handle it, I’d love to see a game outside in Ottawa… (I’m not holding my breath) If I ruled the world there’d be a game on Parliament hill, penalty box next to the eternal flame.
    8. Rumours I’ve heard for next year: Rangers vs Kings @ the NY Jets stadium… Colorado vs ? (I think they should go west next year)

    Anyways, 6ish weeks until the next outdoor spectacle… any thoughts on this years Winter Classic?

  2. I watched a bit of the WC, and I don’t really know how I feel about it. It’s strange: this game is designed to appeal to the casual fan in the US, but every year it’s like watching the game played in less-than-optimal conditions, and the quality doesn’t seem to be very high as a result. Some of the aerial shots were nice. But I do have a bit of a problem with this being an actual game that counts for points in the standings. It would be like if the All Star game were worth points.

    I think the next one will be in New York, because this is basically about putting games in major American markets. We’ve already had Philly, Boston, Chicago, Detroit, so LA and New York are only logical. I predict that the NHL will make Sidney Crosby play for LA and Ovechkin for New York, though, so that they can keep hyping up with Sid V. Ovi garbage. I would most like to see the Islanders and the Wild play in a 711 parking lot with a crushed soda can.

  3. So here’s my two cents. Basically the Sens are stuck atop a steep precipice and they’re deciding which way to fall. Rumors are swirling that Murray wanted Clouston gone and Melnyk ordered him to pump his breaks. This seems the perfect time to implement my now famous team of outside consultants idea to right this ship.

    I like the idea of deeming noone untouchable but unfortunately Conrad I think your ideal and minimum expected returns are too high by at least 1 round. I’m almost certain other GMs must smell blood in the water and are not going to hasten Ottawa’s rebuild if they can help it.

    So here’s my plan. Call Murray on the carpet and tell him if he wants to fire the ginger hammer he’s gotta get behind the bench with the stipulation that he’s not going to return to the front office. Take your pick, swan song from the press box or behind the bench.

    Second, play the youngin’s also known as tanking. Get these kids as much ice time as possible. Make Kuba and Kovalev permanent fixtures in the press box.

    Three, showcase your assets. Turn Alfredsson into a powerplay specialist and shorten the shifts of everyone else. The theory being the less time they spend on the ice the fewer chances they have to look horrible. This includes not rushing Spezza back from injury. Shelve him for reals.

    Four, See if half of NHL GM’s really do spend more time smelling their fingers rather than using them to dial a phone. And by that I mean sell off some prospects to show people you’re serious. For example sell high on Cowan? His value won’t be this high again until just before his entry level deal expires.

    Five, hire someone, anyone from the Detroit organization to be the next GM. Is there a lady Bowman floating around?

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s