James Day Preview: Ottawa gets it over with I mean visits the Chicago Blackhawks

Good Luck Chuck

Welcome?
Off the hop, you know what’s going to be dynamite? The month of November, where I can actually talk a bit of shit about the team the Sens are playing once in a while and lay off the whole “Here’s what Ottawa must do to hide from the impending Mongol hordes as they look to expand their glorious empire and boil alive those who dare defy their advances in scalding vats of Kelly Hrudey’s hair gel” angle.
But here we are again tonight. Playing another excellent team that just earlier THIS YEAR you could have had a conversation like this about:
Human Being: “Hey so who do you think is going to win the Stanley Cup this year?”
Human Being 2: “Well, the Chicago Blackhawks haven’t lost a game in months…so I’m going to wager the Chicago Blackhawks are the favorite to win it all.”
And then? Theyyyy diiiiiiiiid.
Ugh…this team. I remember I was in Chicago in the summer a few years ago and there was a Blackhawks fan convention at the hotel (that’s right ball so hard that I stay at a hotel) I was staying at that was basically themed “Buckle up because the Blackhawks are going to be good now.” AND THEN JUST LIKE THAT THEY FRIGGING WERE. It was like a Eugene Melnyk radio spot come true! RRRR ALWAYS A BRIDESMAID. I’ve kind of spited them for that ever since. Collect some draft picks and free agents and bling blong blang, you’re the class of the NHL.
I admit I sided with Brian Burke when he snapped on that journalist for that “why dont you copy the Pittsburgh model?” suggestion. Like, what? No one’s saying “Hey why don’t you just copy the Edmonton model of getting the no.1 draft pick nearly every year and continuing to miss the playoffs by a country mile.”
What can I say, sometimes a team gets Jonathan Toews with no. 3 overall and hmmmmm other teams get *puts on reading glasses* …Alexandr Svitov(.com). I suppose when you stink as bad as Chicago did for as long as they did you get something out of it…but on the other hand, Blue Jackets…so…let’s move on…

Well, at least Nikolai Khabiboulicantbelievehestillplaying is getting the start.
Not that the Senators have lit any mups when it comes to taking advantage of the complete lack of rispeck that other teams have been showing them by putting in their backup goaltenders. Worst of all the Sharks gave Alex Staylok his first start ever. We’re that team right now.
Granted Khabibulin is a former cup winner, 4 time all star and 2 time Olympic medalist…but please, can we remember that one of those Olympic medals was won the same year Michael Jeter won the Prime Time Emmy for Best Supporting Actor in a Comedy Series for his performance as the beloved Herman Stiles on Evening Shade? Can the Sens not put a few past the good old ‘Bulin Wall for old time’s sake? Now that I think about it, he has been playing for the Oilers for a few years and might be used to getting peppered with shots. What’s that? Oh, right, and the Blackhawks are playing in front of him.
*Puts hand on Craig Anderson’s forehead, checks pulse* Hmmm…and you’re sure this is the same guy who had the astronomical save percentage just a few months ago? Fascinating specimen! Sounds like someone’s got a case of SENATORS GOALTENDER (Caused by bad babysitting defensive coverage). Give him 50cc’s or whatever it takes to get back to that place. Legal or illegal. I’m not at all ready to give up on Andy or anything but with where I think the team is at, Andy or Lehner OR WHOEVER (Mike Brodeur?) is going to have to straight up steal a couple to give the Sens some breathing room so they can right the ship. So far Lehner has come to the closest. No info for the DEA on who’s getting the start for Ottawa tonight because WTYKY is your source for up to the minute player information ACCESS.

MacArthur in..Greening out? K.
I’ll take it. MacArthur has basically been one of the few good possession players on our puck possession team. I felt he was really missed last game because I like when Ottawa can gain the zone! The fact that he’s coming back from an injury means I’m not going to expect to him to be the team savior. Besides I’ve already put that unfair expectation on the goaltenders so…. Oh loooooooook Colin Greening could be a healthy scratch tonight. I suppose that’s normal for a young player looking to make his way in the NH–oh, what’s that? Just signed him for 3 more years? Oh, well….ummm….get your bologna together. This is real LIFE. I can’t make up my mind about Greening. Seeing him get scratched so early into the season is…helping me make up my mind. 

Another bit of news has been the return of Bobby Ryan to the top trio in practice. This to me isn’t where the Senators problems lay. Ryan, Spezza, Turris, Karlsson, the big guns, are producing fine. They aren’t going to get a point every game but they damn near are. I couldn’t be more happy to have Zibanejad in the top six. Say what you will about the resuls they’ve been getting most nights but:

Michalek – Spezza – Ryan
MacArthur – Turris – Zibanejad

…pretty boss top 6 if you ask me. Weird that the Sens keep getting criticized as slow where I would describe 4 of those top 6 forwards as fast. Again, I can’t wait to play some terrible teams at some point. Wow, that is a horrible attitude to have. Get it together, me.
This is going to sound kind of ridiculous but the Sens need to come out looking like they want it more and to stay that way. They definitely showed that they have that gear against the Wings but then just looked flat against both the Ducks (that fucking name) and the Sharks (see how easy it is to name a team, Ducks?). *scary negative political ad comes creeping in* C’mon, The Ottawa Senators…what kind of a team are you REALLY trying to tell us you are*?

Back to Back Games No Match for Ottawa’s Whack to Whack Games….
Chicago might be coming into tonight’s match with sore goal scoring wrists from whooping Minnesota’s ass 5-1 last night then taking an ARDUOUS hour long flight home to sleep on their own pile of cash. This is another thing Ottawa’s not been able to take advantage of. San Jose looked a bit sleepy at points on Sunday but nothing frightens away Mr. Sandman like a shorthanded breakaway. If I were to give Ottawa one criticism for their struggles so far is that they are lacking a killer instinct. Granted they’ve been playing some great teams so far this year but something that makes those teams great is that they can still win no matter the circumstances surrounding the game. They overcame pressure in their win against Phoenix and especially in Detroit but they’ve been blowing big chances to improve their record for nights like tonight where like Chuck Norris before them, they are against all odds. No seriously look up the betting line for tonight…

*Paid for by the Friends of the Ottawa Senators WTYKY foundation for the winning of this goddamn game.

James Day Preview The Mighty Dung of Anaheim at the Ottawa Senators

Brainwash
Hi Everybody

Any of you catch that game on Wednesday night? No? Oh, DEEECENT win. *Brushes previous incredibly pessimistic game preview under couch* Hey, I did say that the Senators were going to have to play their best game of the young season to beat the Red Wings and that much was true. Stars played like stars, scoring happened early and often, possession was good, parade to penalty box cancelled, goalies chased, Alfie neutralized, laughter and love shared. Hands down the most satisfying win of a thus far up and down season.
Okay, so everyone shut down their computers we’re all finished her–
*BIZARRO JAMES BURSTS THROUGH COURTROOM WALL KOOL AID MAN STYLE (except quite he’s noticeably injured and in considerable pain)*
“OH THERE IS JUST ONE MORE QUESTION(S), YOUR HONOR!!!………fuckin…elbow is killing me here…ow…I mean…*winces* IS THIS GAME ACTUALLY EVEN MORE OF A STATEMENT THAN THE WINGS GAME?”

Good question, bizarro me!
There’s no discounting the statements made and emotional impact of the win against the Red Wings:
1. Curb stomping of new, scary divisional rival in their own building.
2. Olde Capatain thoroughly outplayed by New Captain.
3. Mika gets on board in first game back with big club.
4. Disciplined play for a change
5. An important bounce back effort…ahhhhh let’s stick with this point! Meet me in the paragraph below for more:

The reason I think this game might be more important is because the Detroit game came on the heels of what I thought was just a godawful performance against the Oilers a few days earlier. I’ve been saying this for a minute, and I don’t think I’m alone on this, that the Senators are a much better team than they’ve been playing as so far. Detroit was a solid case for that but not every game is going to be a six-one route unless…
“Are you there God? it’s me person wasting Your time praying about professional sports…”
Want to make a real statement? Come off your best game by beating the team that you played your worst game against. If Ottawa’s going to continue to make the playoffs they’re going to have to show they can win consistently and at home. I don’t know if you looked but Ottawa plays an NHL record 349 games next month. It’s going to be relentless.

That Last Game Against Anaheim Went Less Than Well.
Road game or not, when you witness your team hang their goaltender out to dry to the tune of 50 shots it can be a bit tough to “Keep Calm and egferahabvoerghbvsuibbhjv On.” It was cool to see Bobby Ryan score in his return and silence doubters during his INFAMOUS 2 game goal drought but I’m sure he would have traded the tally for a W. It was flattering even at a score of 4-1 as Robin Lehner was absolutely sensational in his effort to keep the garbage avalanche from burying him. Tonight will be different with Craig Anderson getting the start after a very solid performance against the Wings. Andy made some big stops and only surrendered one power play goal. I’ve found Andy’s game a little weird so far this season. He’s made some mind blowing acrobatic saves when he’s had to be there but also let in some real stinkers. Last game he only did the former and hopefully he can build on that and return to the world destroyer that we know and love. Lehner will serve in a “Pondering which of Anderson’s body parts to keep as a talisman after the Hour of Purification has passed” role. I can’t find any info on who starts for Anaheim…look I’m just punching my way through life in this work-a-day world. THANKS FOR READING.

OOF UHH SILVERMOUNTAIN SAY OOF UHH SILVERMOUNTAIN! 
Tonight marks the still very much beloved Jacobi Silfvermountain’s return to the CTC. Silf has been quite good in Anaheim and has endeared himself to Ducks fans with his *tries to think of attribute other than his quick release* putting up points right off the hop. This contrasted poorly during Bobby Ryan’s LEGENDARY two game goal drought heard round the world.
Sens fans know well that Bryan Murray gave up a very good player for Bobby Ryan. With Mike Milbury having moved on to a career in yelling at TV personalities and cameras, it’s a world of more or less logical and fair trades. Pretty much like David Rundblad for Kyle Turris, or Nick Foligno for Marc Methot, we knew we were losing a quality player in the trade but I think getting one in return that is better for the team. I think Rundblad is great but even MORE great is how Turris as many points in his last 9 games as Rundblad has in whole career. I have the same expectations for the Silfverberg / Ryan trade. If I had one knock on Jakob’s game it was how slow he got off a wrist shot it was his consistency. I think Silfverberg’s going to do well on a team as good as Anaheim’s but as the season rolls on we’ll see the All American Ryan’s stat line pull away from Jakob’s. What about Stefan Noesen and the 1st round pick?
MOVING FORWARD!

And the REST!
Big games from Ryan and Spezza overshadowed a few other positive notes to build on:
– Karlsson has been pretty solid and is definitely putting up points like he should registering 5 in his past 3 games. Which is nice. He’s quietly tied for 3rd in team scoring. Just keep rolling and recapture the flowetry we all love you for.
– Shut down D guys Methot, Cowen and Gryba each played well against the wings. Cowen had a goal and Gryba had an absolute snipe because blowout. Please continue being good defensemen!
-If Spezza or Ryan can score tonight…it’s going to start getting pretty hilarious.
– Another good game from call ups Derek Grant and Merle Zibanejad (what he’s technically a call up). Ziba had a great feed on Gryba’s goal and though Grant didn’t get on the score sheet he is much, much better at playing hockey than Matt Kassian. They both have made the team more threatening.
-Point per game defenseman Joe Corvo looked like Joe Corvo in the defensive zone. He plays defense like how people who don’t watch Sens games THINK Erik Karlsson plays defense #WTYKY4Truth. Round it out Joe.
– Teemu Salane is a game time decision as he is 43 years young and played just last night in Montreal. I’m not having a go either. I’m fucking terrified of this super human athlete. He has 21 points in 24 career games against Ottawa. NOTHANKYEH.
– Have you heard of this guy Mathieu Perreault? Yeah me neith, but 9 points in his last 9 games and one of three Ducks to have 9 points in 10. I don’t like him.

If Ottawa can put the shoe on the other foot and take advantage of a team who’ve just dropped two in a row on a road trip, that could do wonders for staving off what could be a blood bath (seriously fucking gross saying btw…bathing in blood…just…anyway) against the always intimidating during the regular season San Jose Sharks on Sunday.
Again, this is the big statement game in my eyes. Even just a very complete game, especially on the defensive side, would show that this is a Senators team getting it’s act together and is ready to start making some noise in the *puts on reading glasses and looks it up in other browser* ATLANTIC DIVISION!

ENJOY THE GAME AND GET HYYYYYYYYPED IN THIS CLIP FROM THE FABULOUS BOBBY RYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNN: 

James Day Preview: Detroit Absentee Dads Host the Ottawa Weekend Dads

Somedaddy that we used to knowwwwwwwwww

Somedaddy that we used to knowwwwwwwwwww

What? I told you I don’t do a game preview without my LEAN POCKET! I don’t car– Oh, WHAT the media is actually paying attention the Sens for five mintues?! Ahh what better game than against one of the best teams in the league. *Hastily changes out of “PUMP IT UP!” themed jogging pants, kicks empty Lean Cuisine dinner packages under couch, smooths out hair with TV remote buttons*

Ahem,
As Ottawa Senators fans we’ve seen some cruddy player related stuff in our time. Supposed generational talent 1st overall pick flame outs, contract hold outs, star players left to walk for nothing, trade demands, hobos, sea captains, Jonathan Cheechoo. This one is different though. Daniel Alfredsson was for nearly two decades the father figure of this still young franchise. He did 17 tours with the Sens and has done more for the team than anyone else in its history. Even up to last season’s playoffs he was a hero. Given the past few years’ uncertainty surrounding his future, I’ve always said that if the time came toward the end of his career that if he wanted to get a good shot at the cup on another team, well, he doesn’t owe us a goddamn thing at this point and he’d have all the right in the world to. Thing is when it actually happened I gotta say….rougher than I expected. I’m not going to get into the minutia of it all other than I think both sides are BSing a bit AND telling the truth a little bit. Melnyk lil cheap on the ol’ pay day, Alfie liiiittle hasty on the ol’ exit after giving every indication he’d resign. Which is actually a pretty good symbol of how I feel about him going into tonight: Him playing for another team changes nothing about what he did for the Sens buuuuuuuuut him playing for another team changes my attitude toward him.
He plays for another team now. I more or less hate all of the other teams and a highly skilled divisional rival well…I don’t care HOW nice those uniforms are. As for his plan, I don’t hope the Red Wings can win a cup for Alfie because I care about the Sens winning so much more than that. C’mon James…try to finish strong with a Klassik Kuote:

Those are all the things that I’m going to have to be saying about those things” – Forresstt Gumps. 

Now I’m Going to Talk About Zibanejad but also Derek Grant for good measure
I’ve noticed in a lot of conversation surrounding this whole Zibanejad demotion thing is if you’re in favor of returning him to the big club that you see him as the answer to the Sens woes. I definitely get that one shouldn’t put too much into one player being inserted into the lineup. I can’t, however, discount the fact that a very good hockey player is being added to the team and think he helps their chances for success. Zibanejad will start the game anchoring the fourth line twixt Derek Grant and Erik Condra, which is a pretty badass fourth line if you ask me. Hopefully we get to see a big game from Ziba who’ll have a lot too prove in his 2013-2014 debut. It will likely be tough for him to make a mark on the score sheet though as my guess is his ice time will be pretty sparse playing in a more defensive role in his first game. BTW, the way this team gives up shots / doesn’t take advantage of opportunities, “a quiet but solid defensive game” qualifies as an outstanding performance to me at this point. Speaking of which I’d like to touch on Derek Grant for a moment.
To build on what I was saying about how having a solid game qualifies as awesome, that is probably best personified by how call up Derek Grant performed in the complete garbage dump game against the Oilers Saturday. I was pretty surprised to see he got under 6 minutes of ice time because:
1. He’s a penalty killer how does he not get 25+ minutes of ice time (see what I did there)?
2. I noticed him every time he was out on the ice.
He may not have gotten on the score sheet (leave that to Chris Neil* and his BEAUTIFUL snipe on Dubnyk**) but I thought Grant was very good on the kill really getting uhh…whoever plays defense for Edmonton on their (?) heels in their own zone a couple of times. I can see how he tends to lead Binghamton in shorties. OOoooOOOoooOO, I see Clarke MacArthur and Jared Cowen are playing tonight so Grant will have plenty of time to show MacLean what he can do on the PK.

The Ottawa Senators Power Play Dancers Feat. Chris Neil and Chris Phillips Needs To REST. ITS. CASE!!!
Okay, Paul MacLean, I get it, I get it, I get it you want the team to shoot the puck more. Lessons have been learned, laughter and love shared and so on. Now please take Christophers Phillips and Neil off the power play before I shoot myself more (HYPERBOLE!).
Ugh, Praise Be 2 Jah that Neil’s goal wasn’t on the power play then this stuff would have had some  justification behind it. Can we go back to the best players play mantra? But as in the best players get to prove themselves as best players again…please? Oh goooooooooooooooooooooooooood Wiercioch has been scratched. So…now I can’t believe the question on my mind is: Who is the better option for Karlsson’s partner for the 1st unit power play tonight……Chris Phillips…..or….Joe Corvo? Ihavetoliedownforawhile.

Smooth Jimmy’s #REALTALKidzKorner
I tune into every game hoping that Ottawa wins (doi, what am I a Flyers fan?) but this one is going to be really tough. No doubt Ottawa (as an entire team) is going to have play their absolute best game of the season to beat a highly motivated Detroit Red Wings. With the Senators coming off a loss, again I must stress the badness of this loss, where they couldn’t connect two passes in a row and were nearly shut out by the Oilers are now up against a team who’s own recent loss consisted of not only shutting out the best team in the league but facing a goalie with zero losses on the season and who’s so Hansel level hot right now that he actually also shutout the shootout INCLUDING THIS SAVE AGAINST NOTED WAR CRIMINAL TODD BERTUZZI. Ugh! Hockemotions.

Anderson gets the start tonight facing one of the most disciplined system teams in the league. Unless there’s a sea change in play, he will basically have to save the defense’s skin who have been putrid so far this year. Jimmy Howard who is a goaltender getting just his second start since returning from the IR and also enjoys playing behind defensemen gets the start for the Wings.
I know this has been a bit of a downer preview but Ottawa has a ton to prove tonight. They aren’t on a huge road trip anymore and they’ve had time to rest and regroup. We all know Ottawa is a far better team than they’ve been playing as so far this year let’s see if they can show us. This game could be a real statement if Ottawa can manage to look good. It’s going to come down these 10 hilariously simple and copyrighted fundamentals of winning a hockey game:
1. Win faceoffs and maintain possession b/c u r a posseshhhhh team btw
2. Stay out of the penalty box
3. Stay out of the fucking penalty box
4. Stay out…of that motherfu–
5. Get QUALITY scoring chances oh and don’t forget to capitalize on them occasionally!
6. Play some respectable defense…YES I know Joe Corvo is playing in this game.
7. Star players need to look like star players.
8. Simplifyyyyyyyy maaaannnnnnnnnn (aka shoot maaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan)
9. Again, the penalty thing.
10. WHY ARE YOU LISTENING TO ME GO WIN THIS STUPID GAME!

Now go out there and
ENJOYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY the game

Whatever the opposite of “bold” prediction: Alfie to score emotionally confusing goal.

*Heyyyyy let me beat this horse to death: Neil’s one goal on the year is 100% more than Dany Heatley whom I’m hoping becomes this century’s Scott Gomez

**Whom is still considered to be developing despite being drafted 9 years ago because Oilers.

James Day Preview: Your Ottawa Senators HOST the Nude Jersey Devils

"Jagr? Brodeur? I got chunks of guys bigger than them in my STOOL, OHHHHH!" - J. "Old Blue Eyes" Spezza

“Jagr? Brodeur? HA! I got chunks of guys bigger than them in my STOOL!” – J. “Old Blue Groin” Spezznatra

Hello! Everybody!!
WELL………it’s been an emotional road trip for each and every last one of us. We’ve grown as people, made friends with a few anthropomorphic creatures and may have even learned a lesson or two along the way.

One thing I, myself, learned is that a long western road swing…not ehhhh…my favorite way to start the ol’ season off. I mean, time difference was one thing but seeing the team face some tough opponents in a situation where they’d likely struggle at the best of times was rough. What made it especially tough was with so many teams coming out of the gate strong (among them Calllllllllllllllgaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrrryyyyyyyyyy?) and nothing more than a so-so and pretty meaningless preseason to draw on, this is all we knew of the 2013 Senators. Let’s break it down:
– A dog fight 1-0 win against the Sabres
– A heart breaking blown 2 points against Toronto (which I think crushed a few people’s spirits)
– A squeaker OT loss against LA
– Dark Matter (x 2)
– Gutsy comeback win against the Yotes.

A veritable potpourri of flavours. After all of that, I will TAKE a clean slate of .500 to build off of. So now it’s over and in the rear view. Let’s get to tonight’s game:

*Looks at New Jersey’s record, takes off shirt and flexes chest muscles in bathroom mirror…but then remembers Ottawa’s record isn’t very great either, eyes start welling up a bit…but still flexing*
My first inclination as a fan is to think, “Ruh roh, the first game back after being on the road is almost always a rough one”. Here’s the leveling out though: New Jersey is also coming off/still on a long road trip rich with ass kickery. More ass kickery than Ottawa experienced even!
As has been well documented leading up to the game, with the Powerhouse Sabres recent defeat of the Islanders, the Devils are now the NHL’s lone team without a W on the season. That’s getting pretty bad considering its more than halfway through the month.
This means that either New Jersey, having spent a couple of days on the East Coast now, will come out fierce in a desperate attempt to right the Good Ship New Jersey Garbage Barge or the Senators will try to pull an Anaheim Ducks and gas pedal the Devils. As usual, it will depend largely on ……………………………

Your Honor the court will now hear the case of Baldy Vs. Blimpy
Livin’ legend, future first ballot hall of famer and Delicio Rising Crust Brand Pizza enthusiast Martin Brodeur will start in goal tonight for New Jersey. For maybe the first time in his career this may bode well for the Senators as Marty has positively struggled in his 3 starts so far this season. His ten goals against make for an uncharacteristic and Dan Clouthieresque 3.19 GAA. What has to be most concerning though is his …uhh…also Dan Clouthieresque save percentage of .878. These numbers are admittedly a little bit on the “early season wacky stats” side. No one wants to see Marty get in his street hockey wizard zone to make up for a bad start but still the door does look open to Light Up a Legend tonight.
That is if Craig Anderson can please, please, please, let me get what I want. Which is not giving up the first goal of the goddamn game. No less important would be not giving up goals in bunches like he’s been doing as well. Anderson, who is sporting a 3.10 GAA himself,  hasn’t necessarily been awful so far. Both he and Lehner have been hung out to dry by putrid defensive zone play and constant penalty kills. He’s made some huge, huge stops that have kept Ottawa in games but those early goals and multiple goal periods have been an undeniable weak point for him. Give up one or two early and there’s no doubt that:
1. New Jersey will trap up like nobody’s biznas to protect their lead.
1a. I will get very wasted trying to watch that.
Now go out there and HAVE FUN……but seriously, don’t let in the first fucking goal.

Captain Contery on Back.
For a guy with a bad back Spezza didn’t have a problem puttin’ the whole friggin game on it in Phoenix am-I-right-peop-lllle? OHHHHHHHHHH! *takes cartoonishly large pull on e-cigarette*
His game wasn’t perfect but how mad can you get at a guy who was responsible for 100% of the team’s regulation time offence in a much needed win? Fantastic to see the guy score a Karlssonian Rocket from above the circle but also a couple of dirty ones. Much like Bobby Ryan did previously, Spezza looked noticeably looser after potting a couple. There’s an awful lot of pressure on Spezza this season and no doubt a natural hat trick lets Spezza head into his first home game as captain as easy breezy as a certain blogger after he spends lunch time in a supply closet with Silent Sam Vodka (OFFICIAL odorless vodka of WTYKY). On the other side of this, Erik Karlsson has looked a little stiff out there. Personally, I think we’re going to have be patient with Karlsson’s game for a few months still. Taking into account even the most basic estimations on recovery time and despite his ability to play, EK will still be healing until early into the new year. That said, he looks like he’s making the most of it. He played 30 minutes against Phoenix and leads Sens defensemen in shots. My guess is he is trying to adapt his game to be a little more of a mental one until his speed returns. As a result he can look like he’s over thinking things here and there. I don’t buy this bologna that now he’s not sneaking up on teams because they are watching video of his tendencies now. Like they weren’t doing that when he had nearly 50 points by December of 2011. Karlsson will be on the creep for a little while still but a point or two should loosen up those hands a bit. I think the rest of a day off of his foot should be a bit beneficial too.

I haven’t seen lines this Wade Redden joke since Wade Redden joke’s Wade Redden Joooke AAAAAm-I-RIGHT-PEOP-LE OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
Thrilled to see MacLean will keep together the lines of Michalek – Spezza – Conacher and MacArthur – Turris – Ryan tonight. Maybe it isn’t what we all had envisioned at the beginning of the year but it’s still early very early. Still lots of season ahead. I love the coach’s tendency to play the hot hand over what he’s “supposed” to be doing. I’m about as mad at seeing Ryan on the second line as I am that Turris has been Ottawa’s best forward. Whatever works is fine with me. Speaking of Turris, how about that Turris. Kid’s a diamond. A diamond encrusted diamond. 

In Game Challenges:
1. Try to identify Ottawa’s new goal song for your chance to be the only person other than the Sens DJ and the band who wrote it to know what song it is!
2. If Bobby Ryan scores use the hashtag #OttawaRoars to be the only person other than the Sens Official twitter account to use it!
3. Spot a member of the WTYKY staff and use the code “Hey what’s up?” for your chance win a personalized “Hey, <Your name here> I’m trying to pass urine here and I can’t go if someone’s talking to me and looking me dead in the eyes.”

GOOD LUCK AND ENJOY THE GAME! 

James Day Preview: Ottawa Quixotes vs. Coyote Phoenixes

Here kid...happy birthday you said you wanted a coyote...here's a drawing of a coyote...now leave daddy alone, daddy's drinkin.

Here kid…happy birthday you said you wanted a coyote…here’s a drawing of a coyote…now leave daddy alone, daddy’s drinkin.

Bobby Ryan is Struggling…to hear what h8rz are saying with his 4 points in his last 3 games….plugging his earz
Well, this whole thing changed in a jiffy. Hopefully Bobby Ryan becomes a metaphor for Ottawa’s season. Put in a tough situation x excitement + expectations = slightly premature shortness of breath.
Ryan has scored a series of beauties and as a fan I am happy to come away from this roadie having witnessed some dirty, disgusting snipes from Ryan and some positively stellar goaltending from Robin Lehner. Ryan has gone from the forward most worried about to one of the most productive. Funny that. And Lehner? Well, backup goalies don’t tend to put up save percentages over .940 when facing over 40 shots in back to back games. Future starters do.
Though I am trying to be patient and everything, as Varada pointed out in his previous post, any possession team worth it’s salt can’t be surrendering nearly 50 shots per game. Speaking of nearly 50 shots per game…uhh can we please win one for the goddamn Gipper up in this piece? I mean you’ve got goalies who are in several cases stopping over 20 shots IN A PERIOD for you. They need some support! They (esp. Lehner) are making scores like 4-1 losses look flattering…

Simplify. These are supposed to be road games!
Y’ever go to see some dumb game at the Paladium Corel Centre Scotiabank Place Canadian Tire Centre and the team Ottawa is playing just wont stop using this stingy defensive trap strategy waiting for the Sens to show off a little for the home fans one too many times and next thing you know they capitalize on a botched fancy play and boom it’s 1-0 for the bad guys and they just trap up again. You have? You know why, right? BECAUSE THAT’S HOW TEAMS PLAY ON GRUELLING ROAD TRIPS!
The roster can change over they years, the coach can change but it seems a constant to the Ottawa Senators that they get caught up in these ‘one too many passes’ type plays. Their passes keep getting broken up and boom back to the defensive zone where the team has been weakest so far. Makes sense they aren’t winning. With Karlsson, Wiercioch, Corvo, Ryan, MacArthur, Michalek…there’s enough shooters out there. Just get them on net.

More like ASSociate Captains
If Neil and Phillips are guys that are supposed to lead by example then there is no word to describe the job they are doing so far…so I’m going to make one up now, “Yeashtfurlap.” As I was saying, if these guys are supposed be leading by example the young guys must be learning heaps about the ancient art of being unreliable. That’s right, Phillips less reliable than Joe Corvo. These two need to turn it around in a serious way. At a combined salary of $5MM and wearing letters…you have to uhh….not be two of the worst players on the team. Contract year Philly, contract year. Neil…uh…..signed through 2016? YEASHTFURLAP. Ugh…moving forward. 

When this roadie concludes, let me be the first to welcome Mikail Zibanachev, General Secretary of Actually Being a Top 6 Player! 
Okay, well, I think it’s about time to rest the case of DaCosta vs. The NHL. I’m not trying to scapegoat the guy but with Spezza back and looking…kind of better(?) and Turris playing quite well, DaCosta is not really doing anything for the team. On the REALreal, we’re talking about a guy who’s supposed to be a top six or bust type guy right? Okay, 40 games, 7 points, -12, time to send him back to the AHL. He’s had an audition that has safeguarded his passing through waivers unclaimed. Trust me, type “Stephane DaCosta” into The Youtube (a video sharing website) the top returns are him him getting hit very hard by a caveman, a mix of Merrimac stuff, Binghamton stuff and a light smattering of NHL stuff (none of it from this season). Teams are not tripping over each other for this guy right now. That’s okay! Murray did not even so much as give up a pick for him. Send him back down after tonight’s game and let Stepha Get His Groove Back. He could always get on a roll in the A and get another call up later in the year. The brass felt Mika needed a lesson taught to him for maybe not playing up to potential in camp. That’s cool. Running a hockey team. Mika played well in MacLean’s system last season and that’s better than DaCosta can say. Now with Pageau getting stapled to the bench last game, let’s bring Mika back, hm’ka-iy?. I’m not saying he’s the answer but I think Ottawa looks like they need his help right now.

Mamma I’m comin’ home
Can you tell I’m pumped for this game? I’ve basically just talked about what stuff that might happen after it. THANKS FOR READING!
When you think about it, it has been a couple of years since we’ve seen a Southwesterly road trip. These things are typically murderous but slightly easier to take when they occur during the dog danglin’ days of December or January when you’ve seen the team go on some winning streaks and losing streaks. We knew in the summer when the schedule was released that this would be a really, really tough way to start the year. I think what I didn’t anticipate was how without much of a precursor other than preseason leading up to it, it gives the impression that this is the only Ottawa Senators we’ll see this year. I think we all know that’s not true so I am very glad to see it end. On the bright side, despite getting killed a couple of times, a win tonight would send the Senators back to Ottawa with a barely deserved 2-2-2 record. Something of a clean slate to return with. C’mon fellas, game starts at 10:00pm here…trap up, win a dirty boring one and come back to our loving arms. 

Worlds Done Collided Video of the Day:

James Day Preview: Ottawa LoserPoints vs. Saint Joseph Tiburons

All jeans available in capri, cargo, or our new CargoCapri!

All jeans available in capri, cargo, or our new CargoCapri!

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Sorry, it’s the weekend and I’m really starting to get into my liquidation denim side project. So, do you want some discount jeans? Just the game preview today? K. Lez GO:

Heyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy not really feeling current top line centre Stephane DaCostaaaaaaaaaaaa.

I don’t think he’s horrible or anything but consider the far superior Kyle Turris looked a little in over his head at times filling in as top pivot last year. After seeing his first crack at it, as a fan, I don’t think I’m interested in watching DaCosta find his sea legs with only one win in the first three games of the season. I simply think there might be better options to choose from
Jean Gabriel’s Pizzageau for instance. If management is okay with trying out a slight, speedy guy in Spezza’s place why not go for, you know, the better of the two slight, speedy guys? In my opinion, aside from Turris, Pageau has produced the most chances so far in this young season. He’s a spark plug who seems to make things happen even when saddled with some of the less skilled players on the team. Admittedly, he does have great chemistry with Condra and MacLean might not be in a hurry to break that up. Still, I think Condra is so reliable that he could make it work for a couple of games with a different centre.
My favourite part of the game in LA on Wednesday (besides watching Ottawa defend a number of 5 on 3’s and Andy surrendering pretty much the first shot of the game *slide whistle*) was when Neil took a puck in the face. No, not because I’m mad at him for taking an unsportsmanlike penalty from the bench for squirting human jack-o-lantern Dan Carcillo with a water bottle. It is worth noting, however, that maybe that’s something you don’t want to see your ASSISTANT CAPTAIN doing with less than ten minutes to go in a tied road game. Talk about getting beaten at your own game. Anyway, Neil’s temporary departure forced Paul MacLean to shuffle the lines a bit. After some initial psychedelia Bobby Ryan landed on Pageau’s wing. I was praying they’d get something going quick to give the coach some incentive to keep them together for a few shifts. They didn’t look out of place but alas it was just a brief tease. I think it’s something that’s worth a try even just to start the game tonight in San Jose. That is if Spezza’s not playing. I don’t think we see the captain until Sunday.
I don’t want to give him all the credit but Pageau’s goal against LA really helped to shift the momentum of the game which was looking like it was going the way of the route after 20 minutes.
If you want to talk career numbers JGP has managed almost as many points in a third of the games as DaCosta has. JGP has put up 5 points in 12 games while DaCosta has 7 in 37 games. Factor in Pageau’s playoff experience and it becomes 12 points in 22 games. Most striking is that unlike DaCosta, JGP is typically buried in the lineup while DaCosta is usually handed a more prominent top six assignment like he was on Wednesday versus LA. Of course the competition you play against is tougher in the top 6 but a pass to Milan Michalek probably has a bit of a better chance of making you look good than a dish to Matt Kassian.
With Ottawa in need of a win on this South Western swing, I think Pageau is worth a try between Ryan and Milo to start off against the Sharks. With all his time spent in the bottom six I also think it’s made Pageau a more physical player than DaCosta. He did put Dustin Brown on his ass at one point last game; no easy task. He’s also solid defensively taking a number of D zone draws…that said, he has been getting killed at the dot lately…so…uhh…I think he’s earned it? No, really, I do.
To me the best fill in, aside from Turris, would be big, quick and skilled Michael Zibaneham. But that’s all kinds of “I’m not even going to talk about that right now.” 

When will Genghis Lehner get his first chance to eat the still beating heart of Craig Anderson?
Though I am pumped as anyone to see Lehner get some game action Ottawa has only had 3 contests in the past 14 weeks of the season. What can I say, these are exciting times with Ottawa having not one but TWO, count em TWO good goaltenders. Facing a team who’ve been the absolute class of the NHL, save for some Def Comedy Jam lockeroom remarks (good luck in future endeavours whoever that reporter who printed that was btw), you have to assume MacLean goes with his no.1 in this situation. No doubt in my mind Lehner will get the start tomorrow against the Ducks…which is…I still can’t believe a professional sports team is called that and this is in a world that has a team called Sheffield Wednesday and another called the Nippon Ham Fighters. *stretches for two full minutes* What was I saying? Oh yeah, facing a team of San Jose’s REGULAR SEASON calibre, we’re going to see how Ottawa as a club needs some work still to take it to the next level. As such Ottawa will need some of that Anderstud swagger tonight. Some of that absolute game stealing shit that he can get on. He was flat out heroic against Buffalo and hung out to dry on penalties against LA and Toronto. Being an NHL goaltender is a relentlessly hard job. After being slightly maligned for giving up a softy and looking human in a first period that was basically a twenty minute penalty kill, Andy not only has to “bounce back” tonight but flat out steal one against an unbeaten team to give Ottawa a chance. Should Lehner get the start and win this thing? Whew, get ready for the makings of Ottawa’s first ever controversy not based on who’s less terrible at goaltending!

Now that he in one fell swoop become a point per game player, Bobby Ryan has silenced his critics for a while so y’all can go back into your nest and you can shut the fu– GodDAMNit Silfverberg has 4 goals.
As it is written in the Book of Karlsson Tweets “#whocares.” Now the new thing is comparing him to Silfverberg? I am NOT down with this. If you seek out ways to be disappointed in a player you can always find them. So let’s all be pissed off at Marc Methot for being a -1 on the year because Nick Foligno is on pace for 55 goals! Fire Murray! I did not fight in the Complaining Wars of 2009 to 2013 on the front lines of moaning that Spezza needs a quality sniper just to malign the guy who finally IS that less than a handful of games into his time here. Ryan’s coming off his best game as a Senator and I’m hoping he can get rolling.
Usually Ottawa gets ripped to shreds on Western road trips. This one has the potential to be a bit different. With or without Spezza, the top line has two players in Michalek and Ryan with years of experience playing on or against a lot of these teams. Ditto Turris, really. I’m not sure how much of a factor this will be but I can’t ignore that two thirds of the goals against the Kings came from Ryan and Milo. It can’t hurt that MacLean cut his teeth as a coach in the Western conference. The West always seems this bruising, quick and skilled Sasquatch (or Yeti) stealthily lurking in the redwood forests just off the coast of the glorious Pacific Ocean. Hopefully with a few of our best players and our coach having seen a whole lot of these teams in the past it will take away some of the mystique surrounding them and Ottawa can just focus on how they are really fucking good….uhhh…wait, come back! After looking like they were going to be taken apart by LA the Sens showed they could very much compete with one of the best in the conference. Tonight hopefully they can carry a bit of the confidence in as they face THE best in the We– I forget how the rest of that goes. BEAT THOSE SHARKSQUATCHES!

Enjoy the game and here’s hoping we’re not all watching Saturday Night Live after 2 periods!

GEAU SENS GEAU!

thanksgiving

James Day Preview: Ottawa Senagroins Visit the Los Angeles Krangs

kings game Hi Everybody… Ooooooof, this three day layover betwixt games hath really been a breeding ground for not enough to talk about and too much time to talk about it.
Like my lower back tattoo says, “You don’t get 3 out of 4 points against two divisional rivals on the road without making a few enemies!” I have to admit, it’s been pretty fun watching Sens fans punch back at this panic nonsense about Bobby Ryan (1 point, 2 games played BTMFingW) that’s appeared in the press. Some fans are smart and rational, other fans make “Matt Cooke 4 MVP” signs after he nearly ends a young star player’s year. As I’m pretty sure Elton John once sangsaid, “It’s the ciiiiircus of liiiiiife” (can’t confirm those lyrics as I’m not allowed to watch Disney movies, they give me daymares). The main part that bothered me about  that whole Ryan thing is that the questions being put forth in media scrums aren’t asked by fans. Newspaper articles claiming all of this panic aren’t written by fans. Some shit got said on the “twittersphere” are you kidding me? Sourcing fan tweets? Some of the most ignorant shit on any topic is being said around the clock on that thing if you look for it…ugh there’s enough even when you don’t look for it.
My question is, who’s really perpetuating this so-called irrational narrative? I’m not going to go that same route and lump all the media together as some journalists did fans. Ian Mendes wrote a balanced article for this Citizen this morning talking about how a slow start isn’t unusual for Bobby even during a productive season. Further, if you want to hear some awesome real talk check out this must listen clip of TSN’s Bent Wallace getting neck snappy on…also TSN’s (1200) Shawn Simpson for being too quick to get on Ryan’s case.
Look, I get it a little bit. The top line hasn’t really hit it’s stride (though they have produced a goal) and Ryan has looked like a guy still adjusting and not the dominant force that many think he could be. I think the lesson here is Cory Conacher. Here’s a guy that seemingly “went cold” after he arrived in Ottawa in the Ben Bishop trade after an otherwise hot season with the Lightening. Many questioned if he’d start the year in Binghamton. Conacher has looked like a different player in his first two games of the season but here’s the thing: He ain’t isn’t aint’st. Unlike last year he just knows exactly what he’s supposed to do now. He’s had some time to adjust. Are the expectations different for him? Is the pedigree different? Of course but I’m willing to give Ryan and the Sens time becauuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuse (great news!) IT’S GOING TO BE KIND OF A ROUGH MONTH! Why? Well, a win and a shootout loss are going to be very, very welcome results later on as tonight the team embarks on a nearly two week long road trip against some very, very good teams…including thing I haven’t even talked about—THE LOS ANGELES KINGS!

SFW Groin Chat: 
Since Barack HUSSEIN Obama is in the pocket of Big Time and wont man up to Tim Thomas’ Tea Party’s REASONABLE request to coordinate all time zone’s to American Freedom Standard Time the uhh…morning skate wont be happening for a few hours still and Jason Spezza seems very much a game time decision. I for one am in favour of sitting him if he is not 100% good to go. As has been an affirmation the past three days, “It’s two games into the season, eighty to go.” Think we need this guy now? Just wait till post Olympic break when it’s really going to be crunch time. A wonky groin could bother Spezz all season if he doesn’t take care of it and that’s the last thing any of us want. What’s on my mind is If Spezza sits for a few games going forward, what do we see? Is it Stephane DaCosta centering the top trio? Does Zibanejad get called up? Dare MacLean remove Turris, who has the most 1st line experience, from his productive trio with Conacher and MacArthur?
I’m not saying the Sens have no chance here and the game’s a write off!  I’d never say that but as I just mentioned, this is a very, very difficult road trip. It’s not realistic to expect a string of wins. Getting Spezza back to playing shape might be worth it as the Sens will return to playing crucial 4 point divisional games before we know it. After last season I feel like I can stomach all kinds of injury situations. Not welcoming them by any means but let’s say I’ve steeled myself…especially in regard to a player with an injury history like Spezza’s.

[Update: Spezza will not play tonight. Smoke y’all crack and whatever]

The Battle of America II: Uhh…Carry on Battling Edition
After out dueling fellow US Olympic hopeful Ryan Miller last week tonight Craig Anderson finds himself up against goalie to beat Jonathan Quick…which is a name where if it was the name of the goalie character in the Mighty Ducks 4 you would roll your eyes so hard that you’d have a upside down Nike swoosh shaped wrinkle permanently etched into your forehead. Anyway, if you thought Miller-Anderson was an exciting match wait until you see him have to go up against a goaltender who’s NOT playing behind the Buffalo Sabres!
Sure Quick let in a mortifying 150+ foot goal the other night but you know what? Those happen pretty much every year to netminders of all stripes. Needless to say Quick is going to be looking to erase that shit from memory and from all accounts he’s good at bouncing back (what am I? Made of definitively knowing shit about the game in, game out behavior of LA Kings players? THANKS FOR READING!).

Heyyyyyyyyy Who the Hell Are These guys!? .. No seriously…This has been like writing a preview of an upcoming match against the Illuminati 

I’ll be the first to admit teams don’t get more mysterious to me than the LA Krangs. I know that they won the cup recently and have a bunch of excellent players. So…looking forward to…seeing how their system matches up against Ottawa’s?
Tonight Ottawa faces a slow out of the gate King’s team coming off an embarrassing loss at the hands of the visiting Rangers. Looking at their roster there are a few star players including Mike Richards and Anze Kopitar still searching for their first goal of the young season. I wonder if the LA Times is throwing those guys to the wolves after 3 games. These guys are going to come out swinging trying to erase a loss in what looked like a safe 2 points. Sounds like Ottawa only with zero media pressure.
With the travel, coming off a rough shootout loss and the possibility of Spezza sitting some games, Ottawa is certainly in tough tonight. A big question is if the rest will help the Senators. They’ve had a couple of days to focus on practice…lets hope they spent 50% of it on the power play and the other 50% on defending. After seeing him look pretty quiet I’m thinking the time off will benefit Erik Karlsson who I keep reminding myself is actually still healing. No doubt EK is looking to notch some assists and speaking of which YES I will talk about this…
I’d love nothing more than to see Bobby Ryan pot one even just for his own sake of getting some of the bologna off his mind. He’s actually at a bit of an advantage having played the LA Kings more than any of his team mates save for maybe Michalek (Who’s playing tonight!). Hopefully we can see a bit more of that Karlsson to Ryan breakout that produced some results in the preseason. If he’s kept off the score sheet well, again, it’s only been THREE games. Still 79 games after that.
Oh and stay out of the goddamn penalty box, you guys.

Enjoy the game and enjoy feeling crud tomorrow morning!

James Day Preview: Ottawa Senators at Buffalo Sideburns

Let's hope the Sens start the season off as strongly as Steven did with his JDP image!

Let’s hope the Sens start the season off as strongly as Steven did with his JDP image!

Please click play on video before reading. Sorry if there’s an advertisement before it that you have to deal with…which I’m almost positive there is as now you have to sit through some garbage about TD Bank just to watch someone’s cat fart these days– OH IT’S STARTING GOTTA GO!

*very poisonous looking pitch black smoke clears as you see me dragging myself out from under a pile of burning plastic lawn furniture the size of what the Greater Toronto Area considers a “ski hill”* 

COUGH, COUGH…Hello. Everybody COUGH, My name is James. Let me be your Spirit Guide. WELCOME 2 ANOTHER GR8 SEASON OF THIS WEBSITE!

To say that the time that has passed since last we met for a good old JDP back in spring has been “A Whirl of Wind” would be a thunderstatement *rim shot on broken drums* (it’s probably sinking in that you didn’t miss reading these as much as you thought you did). I’m not going to go over any of it as you’ve heard way too much about it already and if you haven’t, you can catch up here and meet up with the rest of us in a bit. For the first time in 16 months I can finally say…We. Have. A. Game. To. Talk. ABOUT:

The Sens have been dealt a difficult hand being served up a six game, mostly western road trip to start their 2013-14 campaign. To compensate for this situation the league’s schedulers made Ottawa’s first opponent the Buffalo Sabres.

Okay can we TALK about this team for a second?

If you ever want an example of what a good job Bryan Murray has done with the little resources he’s been given, look no further than D’arcy Regier’s Sabres. We’re watching a playoff team that has financial concerns over a guy on AN ENTRY LEVEL CONTRACT meanwhile Buffalo got a new owner that said to their GM, “Here’s all the money in the world, make us great again like we were decades ago.” Bro comes back with, “I got this. Not only have a locked up superstar Ville Leino [basically a street cred Clarke MacArthur] but….are you sitting down? I got us Christian Ehrhoff [basically a decent fantasy league FA defenseman] until…the year…wait for it…2021!”
Imagine what Murray could do with a blank check? Dang. Who knows what the Sabres are going to look like in a couple of years as their two best players forward Tomas Vanek and goaltender Ryan Miller are UFAs at the end of the season. One has to assume both players have been frustrated with living in the cellar are probably going to finally be freed head out of town at the trade deadline. Does this mean Ottawa should ease into tonight’s game like Euge a few pina coloadas and barbiturates deep into a hot tub after a hard day of being the worst on Toronto radio? No. These guys are both in contract years where they could stand to cash in big time. They’re coming to play. Plus, one guy scores a lot and the other guy stops the puck. Could be a rough combo to deal with. This is only compounded by the fact that this is an Olympic year and you’d better believe that Vanek will be looking to crack Austria’s NOTORIOUSLY competitive Olympic lineup.

Hey Erik, what did you get up to this summer? 

“Ehhhhh yeah, I mean, obviously, did the Euro techno festival circuit and ehhhhh went to the gym once or twice.”

Uhhhhh…yikes. Did dude do a few months in the clink for racketeering in the summer?

“I aint seen pipes THAT big since warping straight to World 4-1 back in ’85!” 
                                                    – Super Mario’s Brother (Luigi) 

So I think it’s worth mentioning that Buffalo finished dead last in shots allowed last season at an average of 33.5 per game…or y’know the amount that Erik Karlsson likes to fire in the second period. Seriously for whatever he’s saying about how his foot is feeling, by the look of EK’s arms those shots don’t look like they’ll be getting any softer. Tonight we’re going to get our first look at a Wiercioch-Karlsson powerplay pairing. Honestly, I am tempering my expectations for game one as I remember I was way too hyped at the home opener two seasons ago where Gonchar and Karlsson stepped on the ice for their first crack at the man advantage. I was disappointed when they didn’t score infinity goals on their first point shot. With the addition of Bobby Ryan to Spezza and Michalek you’d think there’d be enough power out there to put one in. With Steve Ott and Walking Piece of Garbage Patrick Kaleta on the opposing team lord knows they’ll get a few chances…if they fail to capitalize on them they are definitely going to hear about it.

The Battle of Goaliesberg

Since Tim Thomas has refused to play for Barack HUSSEIN Obama and finally got his citizenship to his newly established principality of NewFreeLand cleared (meaning his wife finally finished making his passport out of construction paper) it’s not too early to say that a war for the starting spot on the US olympic team IS ON for Miller and Anders– what’s that? Jonathan Quick is American? It’s not too early to say that a war to be Jonathan Quick’s backup on the US Olympic team IS ON for Miller and Anderson!
In yesterday’s prediction post I mentioned that I think if Anderson looks shaky to start the year that Lehner will step all kinds of up ins as soon as he gets the chance and will do his damndest to best him out of the starting slot. Guess what? 24 hours later i still feel that way! It’s no secret that Lehner looked much better than Andy so far through preseason but this is the real deal now, honey (sorry).
Anderson can put up a shutout tonight and he still wont be out of the woods that Lehner is hunting him in. Ottawa faces Toronto tomorrow and has a grueling road trip for the next couple weeks. Lehner will see starts in that time. I still can’t believe I’m writing about two GOOD goalies battling it out for starts in Ottawa. We’ve come a long way, babies!

Kwieting Koncerns

Okay so what does Ottawa have to do tonight to stop all the hand wringing that came from what I thought was a pretty decent preseason?

– Jason Spezza has to get through the game without getting hurt
– Milan Michalek has to get through the game without getting hurt
– Craig Anderson has to get through the game without getting hurt
– Spezza, Michalek and Ryan have to look like they’ve played more than a couple of games together (particularly on the powerplay).
– Erik Karlsson has to look the same as he did two seasons ago
– Patrick Wiercioch has to play at the same level as Sergei Gonchar (No preshaaaaa)
– Jared Cowen has to look like a guy who deserves to make more money than both Marc Methot and Chris Phillips OR put another way more than Patrick Wiercioch and Joe Corvo combined.
– Beat down a clearly inferior divisional rival who are the brink of a rebuild.

Wowzers. A tall order but I think the guys will get some of that stuff done tonight. The more of those concerns they can calm through solid play the fewer rough questions they will have to deal with day in and day out. An early win will allow them to focus on coming together as a team after a weird and wild last season.
Remember October is starting off with an extensive road trip so steel yourself for a bit of a rough go out of the gate. It will even out as the season goes on and hey, it seems better to get it out of the way early than in January or something.
Smoove Jimmy’s Playaz 2 Watch: 
Jean Gabriel Pageau: Get used to this one. Love seeing him lined up with Greening and Condra. That is going to be one fast bottom six line. Greening smash things and Condra just PASS TO PAGEAU. Can’t wait to see if JGP can make a statement early, even if it’s continuing to dominate the face off dot (hey that shit matters big time on a possession team!).

Patrick Wiercioch: Tempered expectations not withstanding, I am still very excited to see how he fares loading up on secondary assists playing the power play with the King. I have a feeling he wont be as timid to shoot as Gonchar sometimes was.

Clarke MacArthur: With all the other story lines going on I feel MacArthur’s arrival might have been a little lost in a shuffle of questions surrounding bigger names. Still, for what it’s worth I think he managed a point in every preseason game he played including a couple of beautiful goals. Also interesting MacArthur is a former Sabre, which is nice….to put “former” in front of Sabre I’m sure. I think he’s going to get a bit of a chance to fly under other teams’ radar as things get going. Hopefully he, Turris and Conacher can take advantage.

Thanks as always for reading, sticking it out through a rough off-season and most importantly ENJOY THE GAME! 

Only One More Stupid Prediction Post Until the Season Starts!

El Predictobot

Hot Christmas, we are almost there!
One more day until puck drop for our beloved Senators. Does that mean ol’ James and Varada are just going to sit on our hands and wait? No. No, that would be a disgrace to the “World’s Best Bloggers” mug you bought us. It would be like taking a sip out of another mug and spitting it into the face of that mug (mugs have faces). Running a hockey blog through the offseason(ish) means having to make predictions about things. Let’s be upfront here, we’re not robits m’kay? We may wear metal crowns like our stainless steel friend pictured above but we have human brains and are learning about feelings. Luckily, being the internet’s 17th most popular Ottawa Senators fan blog (2 years in a row thank you very much) no one ever really holds you to account on your predictions when the season ends so here we go. Enjoy (?) this last prediction post before things get REAL-real for the boys in red, white, black, some sparkly gold and in some cases heritage off-white. First Varada will offer 10 league based predictions with a sprinkling of Sens and then James will follow up with 10 Sens based prognostications with the velveteen touch of league stuff:

VARADAAA: 

10) Someone gets suspended for more than 25 games. The biggest suspension last year was Raffi Torres, who was suspended for the remainder of the semifinals for trying to kill Jarret Stoll with a hit to the head. This after being suspended for 25 games the year previously for trying to kill Marian Hossa with a hit to the head. Can someone come close to Chris Simon’s 30 game suspension from 2007 for stomping someone with a skate? Considering we didn’t make it one day into the season before someone left the ice on a stretcher, I have a good feeling this is the year. Prediction: someone tries to kill a star player with a hit to the head. I’m going to go with Raffi Torres.
9) The trade deadline will set a new record for boring. Especially if the San Jose Sharks are competitive. Outside of their core, there isn’t a single pending UFA who is going to be on a terrible team or who won’t re-sign with their current team anyway. I guess there’s an outside chance that the Sedins are traded, though the combination of Vancouver not being competitive, there being a team with more than $12 million in cap room and the assets to trade for both of them, and the twins actually waiving their NTCs is mathematically impossible. Despite this fact, TSN doubles down on the deadline and provides a solid week of round the clock coverage, resulting in Bob MacKenzie having a Network-style public meltdown.
8) Edmonton is still terrible. Better, but still terrible. Well out of the playoffs. Another top ten pick.
7) The outdoor game between Ottawa and Vancouver will be roundly mocked. It will become the poster boy for the league’s desire to cash in on these types of games. It will be poorly attended and viewed, and will send all Ottawa fans’ insecurity disorders into high gear as the fans of every other team talks about how little they care about Ottawa. The game will actually be pretty cool, though, and we’ll be totally psyched about whatever heritage thingy they come up with for Ottawa to wear.
 
6) The Olympics will suck. They put NHL hockey on hold so you can watch an All Star team destroy a developing nation and then play two meaningful games before injuring your star player. Also, Russian policymakers are shithead homophobes who should find themselves buried in a pit as dark as their bankrupt, cancerous hearts. Also, Steve Yyzerman gets praise for playing the world’s best scorer with the world’s best playmaker. The new jersey’s aren’t that bad.
5) Chris Phillips takes an insanely cheap deal to stay in Ottawa. Like $1 million for one year.
4) Don Cherry will crash his car into a grocery store. On purpose.
3) The Toronto Maple Leafs defy PDO (luck) stats by being OK. Not actually being OK, just having another beneficial PDO this year. This will serve to obfuscate the debate on advanced stats for another decade as Toronto’s 2013-2014 season is held up by anti-stats people as a case study in how stats got it wrong. Tyler Dellow writes several posts that some team should probably be paying him to write exclusively for them, and CBC re-ups Glenn Healy for another few years of nonsensical bullying.
2) The Nashville Predators start the season out 15-22-4, then go 31-11 to close it out.  If this one turns out right, you fuckers owe me lunch.
1) Ottawa plays Detroit in the second round of the playoffs and well all have a nervous breakdown. Nuff said.

Now, James kick a little of that hometown flavour (oof, sorry): 

10) Milan Michalek will enjoy a relatively healthy and successful (60+ games, 25-30 goals) season but… will be dealt at the trade deadline. It will be for a pick or a guy who plays the position of whatever is deemed this year’s “missing piece” oh and also gets “paid less” than Milo. Even though Ottawa will be knee deep in the playoff hunt at that point Euge will be in such a hurry to stop paying Michalek he will actually sacrifice the team’s chances at making that complete croc of toilet garbage vital 2nd round of playoffs that Ottawa must make in order to break even (btw Florida now straight up offering already insanely cheap season ticket packages at 50% off!…its called “breaking even” you guys) so he can save some money for a couple of months.
9) MacArthur / Turris / Conacher will be Ottawa’s most dependable line. 
This isn’t to say that the Milo / Spezza / Ryan line wont perform. They will be fine but not the robits that maybe some are expecting them to be but totally fine. The Turris Trio (not to be confused with the dinner jazz combo performing this Sunday at Vinyard’s …no wait…huh, same guys, nevermind) will be there to pick up the slack when the top line falters. With all the star power the addition of Bob Ryan gives up top and “Pizza Line 2.0” talk, Mac, Turry and ChronicHerb will catch opponents off guard and send coaches scrambling to try and neutralize them*.
*Prediction only valid if Turris doesnt’ have to centre the frigging first line for huge chunks of the season again.
8) Dani Heatley will come out of the gate not terrible but just luke warm and given Minnesota’s compulsive shopping addiction the Wild will be forced to use an amnesty buy out on him…which is just going to be perfect. Don’t get me wrong, guy is going to spend a grand total of 4 minutes on the free agent market. He’s still a two time 50 goal scorer, only 31 years old and produces well enough that a goal starved suitor will want him. I know I have a go at Heatley a lot here. It’s not even so much that I’m revelling at the idea of a guy’s career going down the turlet. Admittedly, it’s not a bummer to see a dude who jumped ship when things got tough not find the sunny pastures he was picturing. What I’m more happy about is that despite Cheechoo being…an AHL player and Andy Sutton barely unpacking his bags in his time here, that Michalek has done pretty well during his time in Ottawa. The team was freed of a selfish, one trick pony player who’d have never have fit in MacLean’s system with his speed and, well, if my prediction holds true Heater now will move onto his 3rd team in the 4 seasons since he handcuffed Bryan Murray in that nightmare scenario. Sens win! Good luck in future whatevers and I hope you are never, ever on a cup winning squad. Imagine Edmonton made him an offer he couldn’t refuse?
7) Willie Nelson will astound his fans by swimming the English Channel. 
But I’m afraid it’s splitsville for Delta Burke and Major Dad.
Collect 3 WTYKY bucks if you caught that.
6) Robin Lehner will cause a goaltending controversy but in a way that is very, very, very amazing for Sens fans. I know, why would I ever wish that? I love Craig Anderson and I know I just posted about why we shouldn’t be concerned about his preseason play AND I just punched myself in the neck for even typing Goaltending Controversy (OUCH, again!). This ain’t your biological daddy’s Senators goaltending contro which has up to last year been, “who is the less shitty goaltender.” No, after a summer of eating nothing but fruit, veggies and the still beating hearts of haters, Lehner is going to play so strongly that he is going to make every Craig Anderson loss look like two losses. Andy, who again I think is tremendous is like almost all goalies prone to the odd blowout. Lehner is not going to have these. Andy is going to start feeling the squeeze early into the season. An event like Andy getting pulled and Lehner shutting out the rest of the game in an Ottawa win or I don’t know…BEATING BOSTON ONE GODDAMN TIME should be enough to get the press and fans all riled for a permanent change. So why do I think this is great? I think that dominant Lehner vs. Anderson playing to hang on to his starting job will be a spectacular show that could float Ottawa through some tough games.
5) Erik Karlsson has been playing rope a dope. 
Prepare for a right hand lead, NHL (boxing things). With all his talk of his foot not feeling the same and connectivity issues or comments that he’s lost a step, I think King K is kind of fuckin’ with us. Sure the optics of him getting walked around a bunch by Crosby in the playoffs we’re pretty scary. Also, he wasn’t the same then. Keep in mind he was playing arguably the world’s most relentless skater at way too many minutes a night, ALSO HE STILL GOT 8 POINTS IN 10 GAMES!!! Given his somehow improved conditioning and from what I saw in preseason I think whatever “percentage” he’s down wont matter considering his shooting and passing abilities haven’t diminished. He’ll also see a 100% increase in Methot backchecking for him and 100% more Bobby Ryans to break out to. I think we see another 70+ point season from the King.
4) Hybrid icing will be the best rule change since removing the “skate in the crease” rule. 
No one will really notice…and that will be a good thing. Fewer broken femur bones!
3) The Senators will still just sneak into the playoffs. 
It’s a hard ass league. It’s going to be a challenging year full of some great winning streaks but some cringe worthy losing streaks. Hey they don’t keep talking about how hard the Eastern Division is going to be for nothing. What? I ain’t going to be mad at Ottawa making the playoffs for the third straight year!
2) Both Shane Prince AND Andre Petersson will each see more NHL playing time than Mark Stone. 
After enjoying a bit of time as the Senators go to call up, Stone will step into the season in Binghamton thinking it will remain that way. Little does he know he will be up against a healthy Andre Petersson who is getting his last kick at a shot in the NHL. If that’s not enough Shane Prince, with no lockout this year, will take advantage of his increased ice time and turn heads real quick. Stone will have to play out of his mind to get his standing with the big club back (good thing).
1) In his return to the Canadian Tire Centre, not only will Daniel Alfredsson’s Detroit Red Wings win but he will score the most emotionally confusing goal in Senators fandom history.
C’mon we watched this guy play for almost 2 decades. We know better than anyone how he can will the puck into the net. Gunna be a lot of people standing and clapping and holding back tears. On a lighter note, I think Ottawa is going to be an incredibly exciting match for Detroit what with both teams being good and Mike Babcock and Paul MacLean’s coaching style going up against each other. We have a great new rivalry brewing here.

Wow, was that the most heavily scrutinized preseason in Sens history or what?

Skelescope

Hi everybody, spotlight please….……….

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Alright, well, I’ll start anyway.

Is it just me or have you ever seen the microscope on a Senators preseason like this one? In some circles, preseason is typically known as the only time when I am actually offered friends’ season tickets. In the past the giving of said tickets was initially met with excitement but things would take a downturn upon parking my buns (ew, sorry) in the seat and looking at my program realizing the burning questions heading into the match would be stuff like, “will the line of Hennessey, Ruutu and Bass find INSTANT CHEMISTRY???!!??!?!” or “How will Derek Smith and Ben Blood manage in shutting down Kyle Chipchura and Tom Kostopolis’ efforts to put the squeeze on Mike Brodeur!?!?!” ONLY. TIME. WILL. TELL. Also, thank you for your continued support Sens Army on this rainy Tuesday night, all concessions FULL PRICE! *Sens theme song trumpet*

Given the playful yet loosely based on a true story example above, the heavy focus on this year’s preseason can only mean the team is much, much better than it used to be and as such expectations for prospects and bubble players going into the real season are high. An additional circumstance at play here, of course, is that a group of AHL call ups, rookies and less than elite NHLers (riding on the wings of great goaltending) just performed even better than the full team all having near career years two seasons previous. A lot of attention now falls on the team’s skilled players in their return to full time duty. When you add in the loss of the team captain/face of the franchise and the addition of a top line player well…I can definitely see the reason for all of the fuss. That said, I don’t think it wise putting too, too much stock in what are games that are of no consequence to the team’s standing.

It’s an interesting dichotomy at work here. For cemented roster players I can’t imagine how exhibition games serve as anything more than an opportunity to shake off a summer of rust. Conversely, for the guys looking for a shot, they might be the most important games they play all year. I have to laugh at Shawn Simpson’s trolling expert analysis that Bobby Ryan is just not ready and Erik Karlsson does not look like the same player he used to. First off, both of those guys produced. Second, I am NOT MAD at guys who make $5MM plus on the roster not playing a split squad game (tremendously stupid idea btw) like it’s the playoffs. Just shake the cobwebs off bros. Craig Anderson is a great example of this. He’s no doubt let in some weird ass goals but otherwise has looked pretty normal (good). Who knows that if whatever bro-bro from the Bridgeport Mister Mephistopheleses cuts in and dipsy doodles left to right on him that maybe he’s thinking, “Enjoy dude, I am not exploding my groin to stop you.” Then again, hey, maybe he IS shaky. All I know is if he’s the latter, this is the time to work the kinks out.

On the other side, you have half the guys playing their hearts out in hopes of earning a spot, a waiver pick up or even just a raised moustache from the coach. Considering just two nights ago I watched Jean Gabriel Pageau go over 60% on draws, score a beautiful one timer (one of many quality chances he produced), oh and level a guy who’s SIX FOOT FOUR who tried to check him…what can I say? Some bubble guys’ accomplishments can be tough to discount. I also recognize that I’m a Sens fan and as a Sens fan I should be cautious and remember that those who fail to learn from the Bochenskis of the past are doomed to Bobby Butler in the future.

All this bologna said, here are some musings (again, sorry) going into the season:

– For all the talk about Bobby Ryan and Erik Karlsson not quite being there (despite multi point games and some highlight reel goals?) not a lot of ink spilled about how Clarke MacArthur and Kyle Turris were hitting it off on some Mark Wahlberg and whatever that bear is called that I’m supposed to think is funny because it says a lot of swears type shit. Sometimes I wonder if Clarke MacArthur will be someone who’s contribution to the team really catches us off guard; Marc Methot style.

– Ottawa…I’m comin in sore. For all the talk of precautionary measures and bobos it is not great to hear about star players nursing injuries this early on…and by early on I mean, the season hasn’t even fucking started yet (theme).
I find there is an easy misconception to fall victim to as a fan and it’s this: That when players return from the injured reserve that they have a full green Mortal Kombat health bar. Most of the time these guys are likely more “well enough to play” than fully healed. In the case of Anderson, having suffered some serious ankle injuries myself, I can say even someone not playing NHL hockey in a position that relies heavily on reflexes, say instead they were some stupid slob, would still be far from normalcy even 7 months later. Are these guys right as rain or playing through the pain? Teams only tell the media what they strategically elect to disclose (which makes Brian Burke all kinds of confusing but I digress) so I suppose when the games are coming every second night we’ll likely see who was pushing too hard to come back and who was just resting while they had the chance. At least we have the luxury of knowing the team is deep thanks for a very stressful 2012-2013 campaign.

– A couple of the guys who I was hoping would have a great audition in exhibition play did. I’m talking about Patrick Wiercioch, Cory ChronicHerb and Pean Jabriel Gageau.

First, Wiercioch who might have the toughest row to hoe, looks like he took a big step. Not that I needed much convincing but with the departure of Gonchar it was great to see him looking in charge and making great decisions with the puck. No easy task filling in for a future Hall of Famer but can we get a bit real that he’s filling in for a future Hall of Famer that was entering his 40’s last year? I quite liked Gonchar during his time here but that doesn’t mean I’m not ready to move on from the guy and accept the potential ups and downs of Patti W. Lord knows Gonchar had ups and downs.

Second, Conacher has looked dynamite since rookie camp. I’m not really surprised. As a fan of a team that for many years tried to find that “missing piece” at the trade deadline, I know there is a lot of pressure on a player who’s been traded and plugged into a new team, a new coach and new surroundings to perform seamlessly right away. Right, Sideshow Mike Commodore? Few guys can do it. Not only did Double C get moved off a sweet gig playing with Stamkos, he was straight up asked to perform a whole new role by Coach Paul MacLean. He’s gone into this season knowing what he has to do from the get go and that’s be that guy in front of the net. I actually think it’s an interesting strategy given Cory’s about 5 foot 8 and nearly 200 pounds. He may not be tall but owning a bulldog has taught me that when something short and wide doesn’t want to do something it is very, very difficult to convince it otherwise. With a slick shooter like Turris centring for two fairly skilled muckers in MacArthur and Conacher this could prove a very, very annoying line to play against.

Lastly, Jean Gabriel Pageau. It pains me in my efforts to not overdue it. Yet. I don’t remember the last time a Sens prospect has performed this consistently right off the hop. He plays both ways, he creates chances, capitalizes on a lot of them, hell he even hits! It doesn’t matter if he’s buried on the fourth line, it’s very hard to not notice his play. Not only was the best rookie in preseason he might have been Ottawa’s best player in preseason. Yes, to consider my own theme, preseason. But it is hard to ignore the consistency of this player since earning his way up unexpectedly from Bingo. Playoff spot clinching end of season games? Performed well and produced right away. Montreal series? A force. Pittsburgh series? Played well (a rare statement for the Sens). Rookie camp? Dominated. Exhibition games? Again, a stand out performance. I’ve heard many NHL players say that the most difficult thing about the game is being consistent night after night at that level. Perhaps Pageau is showing that consistency could be his strong suit. Say what you will about the reasoning behind it but JGP did actually outplay Zibanejad heading into the season. Despite all efforts to bury him in the pecking order Pager just keeps making it harder to deny him. Let’s hope he can keep it up.

As much as I’ve learned during the past 76 weeks of the preseason, I am incredibly glad to see it end. Though I’m very excited about the additions of Bobby Ryan and Clarke MacArthur it’s not only been an emotionally draining offseason but frankly an embarrassing one for the franchise. Nothing like some strong play to hopefully get we fans back to enjoying what we’re here for ……………………………………………

………………………………wait for it………………………………….

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………this COOLEST game on earf……………………………….

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…………………NHL………………………………………………

……………..hockey.